I will get satisfied someday

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12 months ago

I will get satisfied someday

Dancing with joy and crying at the mean time. Warm hug from my mother as she could see the pain, happiness and sense of relief in my eyes. The end of tragic phase, the end of self-proclaimed misbalanced life finally arrived.
How could I forget that date!!
15th February 2018, the day when I cleared my CAP II examination.
Nitya Bhattarai CAP II Passed!!
That was the moment for me. The very next day I started searching for the best “Audit Firm”.
Me and my Friend, the other Bhattarai dropped CVs at every possible firm we could even think of.
To be honest my core target was, I will not be joining the firm referred by anyone. God knows why did I even think so. I ended up in firm which is correspondent of one of the renowned International audit firm. I thought of nothing before joining the firm as I knew absolutely nothing about it, but pretended knowing everything .Two points of attraction for me to join that form was: Foreign affiliation and during interview i was made feel that i am the most intelligent one!!. The moment i fell into my own trap.
Particularly speaking no firm is good or bad. It’s totally upon you, how you cope up with the environment and how loyal can you be to yourself.
Days passed, time passed and I got nothing as I had expected my articleship period would be like.
During interview we are often boasted about the working culture, ethical behavior the firm has adopted. I was so much to it that I often argued with my parents regarding “How clean our profession is”.
My very first assignment UN’s Hatch audit. I was so nervous and excited at mean time that I end up purchasing new clothes as I actually thought I will be going to UN office for audit. New Assignments were added up, I got exposure of different clients, new work environment. I thought I was living my dream.
With time and with my unsatisfied urge to work nicely complying every possible thing that I had studied in the text book. I realized articleship is not as I had thought it would have been.
With biased culture, loyalty to the client made me think more like ethical behaviors are merely confined in the text books. Not to blame anyone but the working culture we are in is so polluted that not just articles but the principles themselves are frustrated with it.
Slowly I understood nothing is wrong with articleship. I am just supposed to do it the way others are doing it. The most fun part about articleship is definitely outstation. It’s actually real fun, until you work late night. Secret not to be revealed but I made enough money to buy a new phone. I was thoroughly enjoying my articleship. But I still had that sense of dilemma if I still want to work in this firm. I don’t know what made me take quick decision of leaving the firm and taking rest for a month or so. Nothing was wrong with articleship or the firm but it was me who was not satisfied. Then I joined a new firm after completion of my one of half year of articleship. Same interview session was experienced by me after one and half year. Only difference was I didn’t expect much as I did earlier. And I was lot more confident. My only mentality while joining the new firm was, “do not repeat the mistake you did earlier”. “Learn, interact, work and go home” was my only mantra when I joined the new firm. My first client in the new firm was an INGO. My first experience of working alone. I never enjoyed working alone but to my surprise I did enjoy there. With the appreciation I got in my client place and the guidance from my mentor. I actually started loving this firm. More assignments, diverse client portfolio has engaged me so much that I do not know how fast this period of 10 months has passed. I am still an articled trainee here. I am currently preparing for my examination.
Finally I have understood, Articleship experience, Audit firm experience is just subjective. No work experience is good or bad. It’s just you and your attitude towards the learning process you are engaged in.
With time your perspective changes.
With time you get changed.
With time you get parallel.
With time you will get satisfied.

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